When she was 22 years old, her parents never wanted any close male friend around Ihuoma Ojukwu. They considered her too immature to contemplate marriage, for fear of contacting sexually transmitted diseases, STD, and unwanted pregnancies. Being an obedient child, Ojukwu succumbed to her parents’ wishes.

But eight years after, the chartered accountant is still single much to the displeasure of her parents, who are bothered that she ought to be married by now. “When I found someone I loved eight years ago, they almost killed me for the relationship. And now I have lost him and others, will I start begging men to marry me or just settle down for just anybody?” she asked.

Marriage may be the most famous and oldest institution in the world, but it seems to be the institution with the most controversial beliefs, particularly with regards to intending partners. In Nigeria, this depends on the tribe they belong. There are diverse beliefs among the three major tribes in the country as to when to tie the nuptial knots. In the eastern part of the country where Ojukwu comes from, for instance, a lady is not expected to think of marriage till she clocks 30 years when her parents and society believe she is matured for marriage. Ada Nweze, a parent and a mother of three, told the magazine that every lady is expected to marry at age 30 because that is the real maturity stage. “If she marries earlier and the marriage crashes, she becomes a liability and shame to the family. It is better for her to be fully mature before embarking on the journey of no return,” Nweze said.

However, Titi Adeyemi, another parent from Ekiti State, explained

that the Yoruba culture does not permit a lady to stay up till 30 years either in her parent’s house or elsewhere before she gets married. Her words: “It is generally believed here that a lady is expected to marry between ages 24-27. If she is 30 years and still single, then that requires a serious spiritual attention or a special deliverance because it is the joy of every parent for their daughter to marry immediately after obtaining her first degree or learning a trade, so as to use her youthful strength to raise her children.”

But Faith Fagbemi, a clergy man, told the magazine that the only factor every parent should consider before giving the hand of their child in marriage is maturity. “And maturity is not by age, but the state of the mind of the intending couple. There are couples that fall between ages of 22-25, yet they talk and reason like 30-year-old people. Either way, parents should ensure their children are allowed to be exposed with close monitoring at the adolescence stage,” he explained.